References: <78079b96.35bbe6a5@aol.com> Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="------------9149D941D1264092FE414249" Status: O X-Status: --------------9149D941D1264092FE414249 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit InaRuth@aol.com wrote: > Ina here: > > I just returned from two days in Brattleboro Vermont. My buddy Robin ( a > friend of 18 or so years) is up at Landmark College (for Learning disabled > students) for a 7 week course and is now attempting to become a full time > student (with gross financial exigences) at fifty. > > Several things I noticed. One is that the course flew right out of the > window! No joke. Empowered by nothing! Nothing said, nothing done. No, > that's not completely true. But remember in SELP we talked about enrolling > your environment into who you've become? Well, in this case Robin did a > better enrollment job, and I became enrolled in our old standing standard > relationship. Except for a few conversations, especially one we had right > before I left. > > So it brings to my mind the fragility of the newness of what we're attempting > or doing here. I could define it as a failure, or - as is my preference - > notice the thrown way of being of slipping into a relationship from how we've > known it to be. I noticed a similar "fragility" during a conversation yesterday with, (of all things), the partnership group that has conference calls every Sunday. I found myself (not having PUT myself there, like any causality) right in the middle of attempting to extricate myself from ineffectual reactions to the conversation on the phone. Interestingly, though, I didn't stay stuck in the stuckness for long, nor dwell (for very long) on monologues nor dialogues that would serve to carry the conversation forward into the future. Furthermore, I beat myself up almost none at all for "falling short". I'm not finding myself unhookable per se, but rather unhookable from being hooked...able to get present fast just by not grabbing onto the current conversation(s). While I was co-leading the Wisdom Course in Denver, Marjie Parrot and I had a conversation wherein I asked her how she dealt with those overwhelming feelings that wash over or overtake us from time to time - she always seemed somehow unshakable, even in upset. She answered that she just let her feelings and thoughts go through - she didn't grab on. I thought I understood, but couldn't actually do it. Now I think this is what she was talking about. (Incidentally, she was instrumental in my choice to be in Partnerhip.) > A powerfull distinction given my son is returning from his > five weeks in Prague on Saturday. I know that the man returning is quite > different from the man who left. But how? Stay tuned! > > Another thing I wanted to share. A week ago I went to the bookstore to find > Hyde's "The Gift" (the reading "assignment"). I ended up buying several books > including one called "The Gift of the Jews" by Thomas Cahill. It delineates > the contribution of the Jews (historically the Hebrews) dating from Avraham > through the modern times by asserting that the Jews have totally altered what > was the original concepts of time, life, eternity, etc. He actually presents > a good prima facia case. > > I then slipped into reading Hyde's "The Gift" and am almost begining to feel > like I'm reading part two. Course both books are an anthropologists heaven. > (Cultural anthropology was one of my undegraduate minors). What I've noticed, > not as a new distinction, but as a new conversation (flipping into Cat 3 for > me?) is how hard it is for most people to receive. I spent a good part of the > 29 hours Robin and I were together helping him write a paper, training him to > write papers and use things (we take for granted) like the dictionary and > thesaurus on Microsoft Word. He expresssed (literally) overwhelming gratitude > as I was about to leave. We sat and had (a true) Cat 3 conversation about how > he'll show someone else how to use the dictionary and thesaurus and pass on > the gift. And then someone will show me how to do something. And the gift > gets passed on again. > > So all this reminded me of the Hyde book. So it's not seashells. I dont' get the "it's not seashells," ref - what's it mean? > It's > technological know-how. And the book got me to thinking about the culture I > was brought up in as a Lubavitzer Jew. Your own culture is hardly ever > distinct for you until it contrasts with the world. It was - in spite of > being transported to the US - still very much a peasant culture. And I > thought of all the gift exchanges. For example, no matter what my finances > while I was raising the children, we always had one night of Rosh Hashonah (if > not two) and of Passover and Thanksgiving here with one or two dozen people > (which for the uninitiated is an enormous among of work, time and money). It > was unthinkable not to do so! Why? I always said it was so that the children > will have their tradition. But in context of the Hyde book, I believe I was > living out a gift tradition so engrained that I did not/could not distinguish > it. And there are so many other gift exchanges as I look at my life. Child > care with friends. Exchanging thoughts and giving feedback on theories > colleagues are developing. Fascinating - synchronicity AND empowered by every thing you do. > So I'm look at the whole thing in a totally new way. And I'm wondering what > inquiries you all have been having about this, and for that matter, what > insights or distinctions you've had. > > I recommend the Hyde book to everyone - even those of you who haven't read any > of the others. It's occured to me that those of us in the UK may have a > difficult time getting their hands on the book. If that's true, let us know > and the rest of the team will get them to you. > > Well, that's it for now. My thoughts are racing. I obviously can't be > accused of being succint! > Thanks, Ina Much love, Robyn > love and kisses, > i --------------9149D941D1264092FE414249 Content-Type: text/html; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bitInaRuth@aol.com wrote:
Ina here:I noticed a similar "fragility" during a conversation yesterday with, (of all things), the partnership group that has conference calls every Sunday. I found myself (not having PUT myself there, like any causality) right in the middle of attempting to extricate myself from ineffectual reactions to the conversation on the phone.I just returned from two days in Brattleboro Vermont. My buddy Robin ( a
friend of 18 or so years) is up at Landmark College (for Learning disabled
students) for a 7 week course and is now attempting to become a full time
student (with gross financial exigences) at fifty.Several things I noticed. One is that the course flew right out of the
window! No joke. Empowered by nothing! Nothing said, nothing done. No,
that's not completely true. But remember in SELP we talked about enrolling
your environment into who you've become? Well, in this case Robin did a
better enrollment job, and I became enrolled in our old standing standard
relationship. Except for a few conversations, especially one we had right
before I left.So it brings to my mind the fragility of the newness of what we're attempting
or doing here. I could define it as a failure, or - as is my preference -
notice the thrown way of being of slipping into a relationship from how we've
known it to be.Interestingly, though, I didn't stay stuck in the stuckness for long, nor dwell (for very long) on monologues nor dialogues that would serve to carry the conversation forward into the future. Furthermore, I beat myself up almost none at all for "falling short". I'm not finding myself unhookable per se, but rather unhookable from being hooked...able to get present fast just by not grabbing onto the current conversation(s).
While I was co-leading the Wisdom Course in Denver, Marjie Parrot and I had a conversation wherein I asked her how she dealt with those overwhelming feelings that wash over or overtake us from time to time - she always seemed somehow unshakable, even in upset. She answered that she just let her feelings and thoughts go through - she didn't grab on. I thought I understood, but couldn't actually do it. Now I think this is what she was talking about. (Incidentally, she was instrumental in my choice to be in Partnerhip.)
A powerfull distinction given my son is returning from hisI dont' get the "it's not seashells," ref - what's it mean?
five weeks in Prague on Saturday. I know that the man returning is quite
different from the man who left. But how? Stay tuned!Another thing I wanted to share. A week ago I went to the bookstore to find
Hyde's "The Gift" (the reading "assignment"). I ended up buying several books
including one called "The Gift of the Jews" by Thomas Cahill. It delineates
the contribution of the Jews (historically the Hebrews) dating from Avraham
through the modern times by asserting that the Jews have totally altered what
was the original concepts of time, life, eternity, etc. He actually presents
a good prima facia case.I then slipped into reading Hyde's "The Gift" and am almost begining to feel
like I'm reading part two. Course both books are an anthropologists heaven.
(Cultural anthropology was one of my undegraduate minors). What I've noticed,
not as a new distinction, but as a new conversation (flipping into Cat 3 for
me?) is how hard it is for most people to receive. I spent a good part of the
29 hours Robin and I were together helping him write a paper, training him to
write papers and use things (we take for granted) like the dictionary and
thesaurus on Microsoft Word. He expresssed (literally) overwhelming gratitude
as I was about to leave. We sat and had (a true) Cat 3 conversation about how
he'll show someone else how to use the dictionary and thesaurus and pass on
the gift. And then someone will show me how to do something. And the gift
gets passed on again.So all this reminded me of the Hyde book. So it's not seashells.
It'sFascinating - synchronicity AND empowered by every thing you do.
technological know-how. And the book got me to thinking about the culture I
was brought up in as a Lubavitzer Jew. Your own culture is hardly ever
distinct for you until it contrasts with the world. It was - in spite of
being transported to the US - still very much a peasant culture. And I
thought of all the gift exchanges. For example, no matter what my finances
while I was raising the children, we always had one night of Rosh Hashonah (if
not two) and of Passover and Thanksgiving here with one or two dozen people
(which for the uninitiated is an enormous among of work, time and money). It
was unthinkable not to do so! Why? I always said it was so that the children
will have their tradition. But in context of the Hyde book, I believe I was
living out a gift tradition so engrained that I did not/could not distinguish
it. And there are so many other gift exchanges as I look at my life. Child
care with friends. Exchanging thoughts and giving feedback on theories
colleagues are developing.Thanks, InaSo I'm look at the whole thing in a totally new way. And I'm wondering what
inquiries you all have been having about this, and for that matter, what
insights or distinctions you've had.I recommend the Hyde book to everyone - even those of you who haven't read any
of the others. It's occured to me that those of us in the UK may have a
difficult time getting their hands on the book. If that's true, let us know
and the rest of the team will get them to you.Well, that's it for now. My thoughts are racing. I obviously can't be
accused of being succint!
Much love,
Robynlove and kisses,--------------9149D941D1264092FE414249-- From bstuhlmu.infoscan@medimedia.com Mon Jul 27 17:48:01 1998 >From bstuhlmu.infoscan@medimedia.com Mon Jul 27 17:48:00 1998 Received: from mx04.netaddress.usa.net (mx04.netaddress.usa.net [204.68.24.141]) by pony-2.mail.digex.net (8.8.8/8.8.8) with SMTP id RAA09608 for
i; Mon, 27 Jul 1998 17:47:59 -0400 (EDT)